🙌🙌WHO NEEDS TO HEAR THIS??🙌🙌
Several months ago, we had some family drama. I am ashamed to say but I was a part of this drama by not keeping my mouth shut. And then I came across this verse during my morning Bible reading. Which in turn, caused me to do more studying & Bible reading.
Psalm 34:13, 14
(13) keep your tongue from evil and your lips from telling lies. (14) Turn from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it. (I didn't tell lies but I used my tongue to gossip, although I didn't realize that's what I was doing). Here are more verses that mention your tongue:
1 Corinthians 14:9
So it is with you. Unless you speak intelligible words with your tongue, how will anyone know what you are saying? You will just be speaking into the air.
Psalm 39:1
I said, "I will watch my ways and keep my tongue from sin; I will put a muzzle on my mouth while in the presence of the wicked."
Wow!! Talk about getting reprimanded by God!!! I was trying to stop drama from getting started but actually started some. And I was gossiping. The Bible also talks about gossip:
Proverbs 11:13 A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.
Proverbs 16:28 A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends.
Proverbs 26:20 Without wood a fire goes out; without a gossip a quarrel dies down.
In an old dictionary I have, the word GOSSIP means (1) rumors & conjectures about others (2) person who originates or spreads these
Realizing the wrong I had done caused me to delve deeper into subjects such as love & forgiveness.
James 4: 1-4
(1) What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you? (2) You desire but do not have so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God. (3) When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.
Two main things seem to be the crux of most of the drama in my family so I'm going to touch on those for a bit. The first is when one person mocks another, or a person perceives another person is mocking them, or making fun of them. Sometimes this is true & the person is making fun. Most times I don't think they mean to be hurtful. Other times, I believe people try to offer constructive criticism. Constructive criticism is simply criticism that is meant to be helpful or useful. Sometimes this hurts people's feelings. But if they looked past their hurt feelings, & LISTENED to what was being said, maybe they would learn something. HOWEVER, even constructive criticism can be taken too far. Some people aren't strong enough to hear any criticism, constructive or not. When that's the case, you should stop. If that means the person you are trying to help learns the hard way or never learns, then so be it. Or, if you are joking & just trying to be funny, if you are told you are hurting that person's feelings or it really bothers them, stop. Just stop.
The meaning for the word "mock" is: ridicule, imitate, mimic. In Proverbs 17:5, Whoever mocks the poor shows contempt for their Maker; whoever gloats over disaster will not go unpunished.
Proverbs 9:12 If you are wise, your wisdom will reward you: if you are a mocker, you alone will suffer.
Psalms 1:1, Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers,…….
Jesus himself had words of constructive criticism & here are a couple of examples:
Luke 17:3 "If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. (4) Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying 'I repent', you must forgive them."
Matthew 7:1 "Do not judge, or you too will be judged. (2) For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you
Proverbs 12:15 The way of fools seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice.
Proverbs 15:31, 32 (31) Whoever heeds life-giving correction will be at home among the wise. (32) Those who disregard discipline despise themselves, but the one who heeds correction gains understanding.
The flip side of this is holding grudges, not forgetting past wrongs or words, & holding on to past words & actions.
1 Corinthians 13:4-6
(4) Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. (5) It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. (6) Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
What these verses are saying is that love does not keep an account of the wrong that is done to it. Resentment is writing down in the book of memory (i.e., remembering) all the wrongs that have been done to us….keeping track of them so that we might consult them sometime in the future for our own benefit. God's love is not resentful. It records no wrong for later reference. Love forgives. It may not always forget, but even when love remembers, it still forgives.
You cannot heal unless you do one of two things – REPENT or FORGIVE. Sometimes you have to do both. If for no other reason than for your own mental health & for you to be a better person. If someone wrongs you, they have their own path of repentance & forgiveness to follow. What they choose to do (or not do) should not matter what you do. And stop blame shifting!!!! Doing the whole "he said this so I said that & then he did this so I did that" does nothing but makes a never ending circle. Can you turn left AND right in a circle? No. You just go round & round.
REPENT: regret as wrong or mistaken
FORGIVE: regard without ill will despite an offense
FORGET: lose the memory of, or ignore
Acts 2:37-41
(37) When the people heard this, they were cut to the heart and said to Peter and the other apostles, "Brothers, what shall we do?" (38) Peter replied, "Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. (39) The promise is for you and your children and for all who are far off – for all whom the Lord our God will call." (40) With many other words he warned them; and he pleaded with them, "Save yourselves from this corrupt generation." (41) Those who accepted his message were baptized, and about three thousand were added to their number that day.
*****Here's the explanation for the above verses from the Jeremiah Study Bible:
Acts 2:38 – Repent means "to change one's mind or turn away from." More than just feeling bad, repentance requires a change of attitude – turning from trusting self to trusting Christ. Being baptized is an outward demonstration of the inward reality of Jesus Christ in a person's life. It isn't required for salvation but a requirement because of salvation.
Acts 2:39 – The beginning of the spread of the gospel to the Gentile world when Peter would soon be called to reach beyond Judaism.
Micah 3:12 Therefore because of you, Zion will be plowed like a field, Jerusalem will become a heap of rubble, he temple hill a mound overgrown with thickets.
This verse explained: Micah foretold that sinful Jerusalem would be destroyed. However, when Hezekiah repented, the Lord postponed this judgement (Jer. 26:17-19) & delivered from the Assyrian army. Many Old Testament prophecies of judgment were conditional &, in fact, designed to motivate repentance so that God could stay His judgment. Although God threatened punishment, it was the last thing He wanted to do!
Prophecies of judgment could be canceled or postponed & were on many occasions. However, if the people returned to their sin, they reactivated the judgement of the original prophecy.
Compassion is sympathy, especially with suffering or weakness. The word compassionate is the adjective for compassion. These 2 words are mentioned in the Bible over 60 times. Having compassion, being compassionate, goes hand in hand with everything I am writing about. To gossip, mock, or ridicule is forgetting compassion. Doing anything that hurts another person is forgetting your compassion for others. But I believe not repenting or not being repentant, not apologizing (& meaning it) & not righting the wrongs you've done, is also forgetting your compassion.
Psalm 77:9 Has God forgotten to be merciful? Has he in anger withheld his compassion?
Psalm 119:77 Let your compassion come to me that I may live for your law is my delight.
Colossians 3:12-14
(12) Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. (13) Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. (14) And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
Ephesians 4:31, 32 (31) Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. (32) Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Having or showing compassion for others does not mean for you to allow them to take advantage of you, time after time after time. And now for forgiveness. Forgiving someone or asking for forgiveness shows strength, not weakness. Forgiveness doesn't mean you have to like the person (although we should love everyone), be around that person, or condone their words or actions.
In Matthew 18:21, when Peter asked Jesus, "How many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus then answers with The Parable of the Unmerciful Servant:
Matthew 18:22-35
(22) "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy seven times. (23) Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. (24) As he began the settlement, a man owed him ten thousand bags of gold* {Greek word is talents; a talent was worth about 20 years of a day laborer's wages} was brought to him. (25) Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.
(26) "At this the servant fell on his knees before him. 'Be patient with me' he begged, 'and I will pay back everything.' (27) The servant's master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.
(28) "But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him one hundred silver coins {Greek word is denarii; a denarius was the usual daily wage of a day laborer}. He grabbed him and began to choke him. 'Pay back what you owe me!' he demanded.
(29) "His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, 'Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.'
(30) "But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. (31) When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their master everything that had happened.
(32) "Then the master called the servant in. 'You wicked servant,' he said, 'I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. (33) Shouldn't you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?'
(34) In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.
(35) "This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart."
***Explaination according to The Jeremiah Study Bible of this parable:
Rabbinic tradition taught that a brother could be forgiven 3 times for the same offense, but not 4 times. Peter, trying to be a better-than-superior Law keeper, doubled that & added 1 – 7 times. He did not anticipate Jesus' response, which is not a congratulations but a correction. Whether the phrase should be rendered 0 times 7 or 77 is irrelevant; Jesus teaches us that believers in Christ have been forgiven far more than they will ever be asked to forgive. They must cultivate a spirit of forgiveness, not a habit of counting offenses.
God expects His children to take on His likeness. If they do not resemble Him in their willingness to forgive, they prove they are not His children (James 2:13). God is rich in mercy & grace, but He is also holy & just, so those who refuse to forgive should not imagine that God would welcome their unforgiving hearts into His kingdom.
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