Sandbox forum: Do you complain?

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Name: Gene Staver
Portage WI 53901 (Zone 5a)
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gasrocks
Jun 28, 2017 10:05 AM CST
When things are not right I believe it is my duty to bring it to someone's attention. Otherwise how will things ever improve? I do not like to complain. Wish I never had to. I do get the feeling from the business involved that no one really likes people who complain and that I just put myself on some list that guarantees I will get poorer service next time. Do you complain if necessary? Example: this morning I am on the phone when I see a substitute letter carrier pull in my driveway. I tell the person I am speaking to that I might have to put the phone down in a minute. No knock on the back door, I see the carrier leave. As soon as I am off the phone I go to my back, unlocked porch, nothing. Out in the rain is a box sitting on a chair in my back yard. Same thing happened last week. I called the postmaster who was less than friendly.
Last Saturday night I went to the emergency room. They did nothing for me. I called yesterday to ask that I not be billed. Return call from someone who read me the notes the nurses had made. How I was fine and did not need any help. Bogus. I now have to talk to 3 other people in an attempt to resolve this. Does this go on everywhere? Gene
Name: Anne
Summerville, SC (Zone 8a)
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Xeramtheum
Jul 1, 2017 7:08 PM CST
First of all, stop complaining - it's always a negative. You put people on the defensive and when on the defensive they are less likely to listen to you or want to help you.

What you need to do is EXplain what your problem is without the emotion attached to it.

Examples.

Hi Postmaster, I was wondering if there was anything I can do to let our carrier know that when it's raining to leave a package on the porch?

Hi Server - I guess I wasn't clear enough that I wanted unsweet tea instead of sweet tea. Could you change it please?

The hospital - you're kind of out of luck there - If they put you in a room, took your pulse or blood pressure they can bill you a minimum charge.

Seriously. Learn to EXplain and not COMplain.
"The Universe speaks in many languages, but only one voice. It speaks in the language of hope; It speaks in the language of trust; It speaks in the language of strength, and the language of compassion. It is the language of the heart and the language of the soul. But always, it is the same voice. It is the voice of our ancestors, speaking through us, And the voice of our inheritors, waiting to be born. It is the small, still voice that says: We are one. No matter the blood; No matter the skin; No matter the world; No matter the star; We are one. No matter the pain; No matter the darkness; No matter the loss; No matter the fear; We are one. Here, gathered together in common cause. we agree to recognize this singular truth, and this singular rule: That we must be kind to one another, because each voice enriches us and ennobles us, and each voice lost diminishes us. We are the voice of the Universe, the soul of creation, the fire that will light the way to a better future. We are one."

G'Kar
[Last edited by Xeramtheum - Jul 1, 2017 7:09 PM (+)]
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Name: Cheryl
Texas (Zone 9a)
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ShadyGreenThumb
Jul 1, 2017 8:06 PM CST
I hate writing complaint letters. It puts me in a negative mood that I hate very much. So I only write letters or make phone calls when I absolutely have to, choosing my battles, so to speak. I start out with a compliment and tell them all the good things that happened. Sometimes I go on and on for a paragraph or three about how good they are. Then I lower the boom. In a nice way. That keeps my irritation level down and gets me results. After all, they don't want to displease a customer who mostly likes their place/situation except for one teeny tiny thing.

The last letter I wrote was to appeal an insurance claim where I only received part of my benefits. I was rewarded for my (awesome) positive writing skills with $670 more.
Life is short, Break the rules, Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly, Love Truly, Laugh
uncontrollably, And never regret anything that made you Smile.
Name: aud/odd
Pennsylvania (Zone 6b)
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Cinta
Jul 3, 2017 1:08 AM CST
I do not like to do it but I do. I agree if you do not express your displeasure it will continue. If I do not like something the offending person will know.

I would have spoken to the postal carrier directly if that did not work I would have gone over his head. I have had to do it many times with postal carriers. I have a sign directing for deliveries.

Name: Cheryl
Texas (Zone 9a)
Region: Texas Greenhouse Plant Identifier Plant Lover: Loves 'em all! Plumerias Ponds
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ShadyGreenThumb
Jul 4, 2017 12:35 PM CST


How Complaining Rewires Your Brain for Negativity

Research shows that most people complain once a minute during a typical conversation. Complaining is tempting because it feels good, but like many other things that are enjoyable -- such as smoking or eating a pound of bacon for breakfast -- complaining isn’t good for you.

Your brain loves efficiency and doesn’t like to work any harder than it has to. When you repeat a behavior, such as complaining, your neurons branch out to each other to ease the flow of information. This makes it much easier to repeat that behavior in the future -- so easy, in fact, that you might not even realize you’re doing it.
Read more:
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Life is short, Break the rules, Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly, Love Truly, Laugh
uncontrollably, And never regret anything that made you Smile.
Name: Anna Z.
Monroe, WI
Charter ATP Member Greenhouse Cat Lover Raises cows Region: Wisconsin
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AnnaZ
Jul 8, 2017 6:51 AM CST
I agree with Ann...........the few times I have "griped" to someone about something, I ALWAYS list the "good" before I get to the "problem". The last time I was SO mad about something, I wrote the letter (with nothing good in it because there was NO good to be said)..........it's still in a folder in my computer. Rolling on the floor laughing That was a year ago. My biggest, most humongous gripe is when I call a "help" line I get someone who cannot speak English clearly. I have already ASKED for someone else and I was not given someone I could understand. That burns my keister.
Minnesota (Zone 3b)
RpR
Jul 8, 2017 11:30 AM CST
gasrocks said:When things are not right I believe it is my duty to bring it to someone's attention. Otherwise how will things ever improve? I do not like to complain. Wish I never had to. I do get the feeling from the business involved that no one really likes people who complain and that I just put myself on some list that guarantees I will get poorer service next time. Do you complain if necessary? Example: this morning I am on the phone when I see a substitute letter carrier pull in my driveway. I tell the person I am speaking to that I might have to put the phone down in a minute.

I will rip some one a new butt-hole if they are truly diddling but generally just nasty looks work. For them to give me poorer service next time, well let's say they will not do that more than once or they will find out what a true bad customer is.
I rarely have problems that a few emphatic but polite words do not fix.

As far as that phone call, you should have told the person you were speaking to, to hang on a dealt with the post man immediately.
Too many people nowadays make phone call the only thing they really care about.

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