New year, new place for grumps.

Thanks, Amanda! Do I need to re post my previous rant?

I vote go for it. If changes only one mind it's a win.

Only thing that makes me grumpy right now is knowing I have 6 months of bookwork I have to do in the next couple of weeks. Gah........I HATE bookwork.

Ok, here goes. Sick and tired of going out and seeing all these folks unmasked in public places. Also sick and tired of folks still saying this is just a bad flu, or worse, as indicated recently, the numbers of the hospitalized folks and the numbers do deaths caused by Covid put out by the CDC are false and are elevated numbers!
How about that Covid is a hoax?
I wonder how all this makes folks feel that have lost family members and friends to this virus. I've found out that a friend of mine at work has Covid. She tried to convalesce at home, but developed severe breathing problems and is now in the hospital unconscious and on a ventilator. This is a formerly healthy woman in her 50s. Now her husband and son can't even be in the same room with her, and she possibly won't survive.
Well, I'll tell you how I feel, if ANY of these no maskers or naysayers tried to talk to me about what they think I would kick them in the teeth, and hopefully knock all of their teeth down their throats so they could choke on them!
I ramped this up from the previous posting on the old thread. I'm sitting here crying tears of rage and sorrow.

I don't blame you one bit for ranting Lynda & with you.

from me too

Lynda

I totally get how you feel. I'm always so frustrated by this too. I live in a small town, and a while back, thousands of people gathered here (many from outside town) to protest against masks and Covid restrictions. They were barging into small businesses unmasked, and threatening storeowners if they asked them to leave. Sure enough, case numbers in the area increased afterwards...

Not long ago, I took my mother to the hospital for something as well. I had to take her back because she had a horrible reaction to one of the medications she was given. Because of Covid restrictions, they wouldn't allow me in the hospital with her. To make it worse, I was told she may have had a heart attack. I had to just go back home and sit there in panic not knowing what was happening. Thankfully her tests ruled out the heart attack. The reaction just closely resembled one.

My father's an anti-masker and thinks Covid is a hoax. Which frustrated me immensely when all of this happened. My mother has enough conditions that put her at risk, and I have to worry about him not doing things to keep himself and her safe...

Lynda, I'm so sorry about your friend. We are mostly being very careful here in our small town and I'm so grateful. Any infections here would be a disaster of the worst sort as we have very little medical help available. People are suffering because of lack of income. With my limited, but regular, income, I've been able to donate to the Relief Fund. I get letters of thanks from the sponsors, telling me I am helping a lot.

Still dealing with pain. It hit me the other day how angry I am about abuse in my past. I would like to write about some of it both to get it out of my system and to help others to recognize abuse and have some ideas of how to deal with it. Any suggestions on where to do this?

Meanwhile my neighbor will be over so we can plan how to get my dog Oso prepped for neutering surgery tomorrow. Her husband is undergoing tests for heart problems in Washington State. (She recently told me that she thinks Trump is the best thing that has ever happened to the USA. She's an intelligent, college-educated woman. I'm stunned and feel that dealing with her is somewhat like dealing with a rabid animal. She also wants me to put my dog Max to sleep as he is failing. But he doesn't seem to be in pain. He eats and sleeps and walks around which is about all I do and I'm not putting me to sleep - as in death - so he stays as long as he's OK. Seems to be in much less pain than I am.)

I think I'd feel better if I wrote about some of the old abuse. When it's hard to move , nasty old memories tend to surface.

Katie even if you don't share your experiences just writing about them could be healing

I agree. As someone who was emotionally abused; I do understand those feelings. Because I was a alcoholic I could work through the abuse through the AA program. It still took me a long time to heal. Is there an abuse hotline in your area? Talking about it CAN help. It's way easier to talk to someone on the phone.
I would avoid that woman if it were me. This may not be possible for you. I learned some time ago to value myself and my time. My time is too precious to spend it with negative people, and I hope not to give offense but I think Trump supporters are very negative people.
I have to be emotionally stable because my handicapped son depends on me, so whenever I feel anxious, upset, mad, or I am experiencing any negative emotions I take a step back and examine myself. Is this something I think is coming from someone, or is it my reaction to the negative person?
Then I have to realize what part I play in all of this. Then ask forgiveness, and let it go.
We only have this day, this moment; we should learn from past mistakes but not dwell on the past; and also not spend so much time worrying about the future that we don't see the days lessons and miracles.

Lynda.. great strategy

Katie.. journal... start a thread here on the site unless you want to be anonymous
Seek professional help- talk therapy
Find a good friend and listener..maybe even in your town

You have never spoke about clergy ...if you are a believer ..seek help from the church

Whatever you do, don't confide in that big mouth battle ax up the road

You already have your niece too

Grumpy... I am not so much grump as I am getting impatient ..as the light begins to poke they at the end of the tunnel.. I have to remind myself not to run

I am grumpy at the propane delivery that missed us early December. Then promised on three separate occasions to come. They look at my usage over a YEAR and decide I am not that important..as we use it " very slowly" apparently ....WELL DICKHEADS!! ( sorry that is exactly what they are )/We are gone 4-5 months out of the year IN THE WINTER and use NOTHING.. and normal usage in the summer..... can't average that in with the winter months considering that THIS winter I am HERE hiding out from the ' RONA

I had a good talk with the neighbor. I have learned not to confide in her.

A journal might be good. I don't want to just whine but to talk about what I've learned and what I understand in retrospect. I have talked to my niece; we share stories of some of the craziness. Last visit I told her about the time I KICKED my grandmother (mother's mother) who had been nasty to me (repeatedly) then wanted me to kiss her goodbye. What I also remember from that is that even though I was crying hysterically (not a normal behavior at all) no one asked what had happened. Like the elephant in the room that alcoholics don't talk about.

My neighbor also misses Inky a lot. She is sure that anyone seeing Inky in the desert with her red jacket and no people would have rescued her which is some consolation. She also admired the improvements in Max and did not suggest ending his life. I suspect that with his having meals brought to him two or three time a day, having sunny places to sleep during the day and sleeping next to my bed at night and me around to remind him he is loved he probably thinks he's already crossed the Rainbow Bridge and is in heaven.

I'm also a recovering alcoholic. Had mixed experiences in AA and finally left when the abuse outweighed the help. Created a lot of resentment in the abusers who were convinced I'd start drinking without meetings. I didn't. Sadly there is no longer a meeting here due at least in part to the problems I tried to talk about to no avail.

FB has been a life saver for me. Lots of good company and it's easy to ignore the bad apples.

When I did social work there was a girl that I was sure would end up dead in an alley with a needle in her arm. Very hostile. Called me a couple of years after she was no longer "mine" to ask for some help. I said sure, she came in - looking great, had a great looking boyfriend. Both of them in college. We had a good talk and I was left feeling that my work had not been wasted.

Nobody as empathetic and non judgmental as you can not have had a positive impact on many !

I am a little bit hopeful for 2021, but still grumpy about something...my son, who lives in Florida, believes in many conspiracy theories as well as the election not being legitimate. I don't know if he wears a mask or not. We have agreed to not discuss politics, as I get really upset, knowing that he believes the way he does. I cannot figure out for the life of me, what I did to make him think the way he does. He is a grown man and has grandchildren, so he is old enough to "know better".

As for me, I am looking forward to a hip replacement as I am unable to walk right now. I am trying to be patient, especially regarding the pain.

Evelyn, a lot of people have children who are just like your son. It's very hard to fathom, but not much that can be done about it. Just do your own thing. I hope your hip replacement comes soon and you recover quickly. Be sure to do the PT they will prescribe.

Karen ~

I think physical therapy exacerbated my condition, as last year I broke my ankle, and wore a "boot". (That, too!) I hope I can be whole by springtime.

Oh Evelyn, I'm so sorry about your pain. Pain can really lay you low, mentally & physically.

Almost a year, with a little bit of garden time in the middle. I miss being outside. Too much TV and computer. At least I have some books and magazines, too. (And seed catalogs! )

My sister in France is firmly convinced that Man never was on the moon, it was recreated in some back Hollywood lot. Whatever. I can forgive her for that since she (and pretty much all the French) think the Orange Anus is a pathetic excuse for ANYTHING!