lol, I'm re-reading this now. Too funny!
I ended up getting a set of grow lights and shelving system, started the seeds way too early though a couple years ago, started them OK last year, but I moved last year so I didn't know what I'd be able to start and what I should not bother with. Same situation here now - since we've got big plans for raised garden boxes but nothing ready to move plants into. The learning continues! I've got the onion seeds started now though, under lights. I much prefer the variety I can get by starting seeds vs buying the sets available in local stores, my seed onions seem to grow so much bigger by harvest time.
I did plant some garlic last fall so I'm hoping those will come up once this metric ton of snow in my back yard melts!
Thanks for all your advice everyone!