Viewing post #1326585 by flaflwrgrl

gardenglory said:Actually, I have had to do that the last 6 months or so. I even did tell Her that I was not putting up a tree. Im doing it anyway, cuz in the end I will like it, and so will she. I guess it just made it real, that Ive got another long month ahead. Im fully aware its better than the alternative, this will be the first year with my beloved MIL. That woman helped get me thru so much with my Mother. She would have been 94 on Thanksgiving.
Mother played the....the doctor told me I didnt have a month left, card, at Thanksgiving, to get all my kids down. I fell for it hook line and sinker, and I think that just started the whole season off bad. It really really upset me. More when she said, after I was dispondent, Dont worry, Ill be here long after everyone. WHAT... I consider those outburst, dimentia sp., but it still sucked. Wont fall for that again.
Im blessed....I know it....just needed a vent to take me thru.

If I had siblings, I would not have to make a fool of myself, venting in public. thanks

Pam you were just frustrated to the max and needed to get it out especially when you looked forward on the calendar & saw the next month stretching out before you like a walk down torture alley.
It's okay. You did not make a fool of yourself.

I was thinking earlier today about how your mom would react if you "killed her with kindness". I'm not talking about doing everything she wants/demands but when she says her snarky stuff if you replied in a manner like Lyn suggested (about not being "up to it" this year etc...) & immediately, before your mom could get another word out, said to her how grateful you are just to have her still living and able to be with you. Hit her with that every single time she starts up.