Angie, welcome to ATP and thanks for the fun thread title etc.
Just my opinion here, but I think you may have panicked a bit, and over-reacted. Windex should not hurt your plant all that much. It is mainly composed of ammonia, and while it is probably too strong to use on a regular basis on a plant, as long as you diluted it well after applying it, especially rinsing off the leaves, I don't think it should harm the plant much. Ammonia is NH3 as a chemical symbol, and N stands for Nitrogen which is the first component in fertilizer. H is hydrogen . . . not sure what else they put in that Windex bottle except for blue color but . . I do know a lady who adds Windex to her regular spray to prevent spider mites on her plants.
So I just wanted to encourage you to let the plant have a rest and dry out, put it back where it usually lives and just keep an eye on it for a few days. As Hetty says, they are fairly sturdy plants to begin with and there are worse things you could have sprayed it with, too.
Just so you'll feel better, I sprayed a few squirts of "mosquito bomb" spray that was billed as "safe for children and pets" around outside my patio door the other day. I expected something that was an aerosol, but this was tiny droplets. Turns out it was composed of some aromatic oils, smelled good and nixxed the flock of mosquitoes, but the pretty Swallowtail Plant that I had sitting by the door really didn't like it one bit! The next day it had tiny bleached, burned spots all over the leaves. It is recovering now but I had to cut it back fairly far to get rid of all the ugly burnt leaves.
