. . . often bring with them hurdles in the form of new emotions, uninvited and unwanted. It isn't Bill you are angry with, my dear, it is the situation that is causing your anger and your hurt and your frustration, and yes, your fear.
It's a situation that controls you, and there's nothing you can do to change it.
Don't ever think you're angry with Bill. Don't ever feel guilty. But you can be as angry with the situation as you need to be. And I'll be angry with you.
I'm glad you are looking for silver linings. They'll be there but you will have to look for them.
Still holding your hand, Gin.