Ginny, go with him to his next appointment to find out or call the doctors office and explain that you need to know in order to get time off from work to be his caregiver. One other thing if his clinic has a website set up for patients, you could inquire there.

Since my husband got seriously sick I have to go with him to all his appointments and he wants me there, so between the two of us we can ask the questions we need answered. We use all three of these options depending on the circumstance.

Thanks Betty. I'll give that a try.

I got a soft covered book - 8 1/2 x 11, telling me Everything I need to know prior to, during, and after surgery. If you like, I can scan the pictures of the exercises, Ginny, so you & your hubby know the exercises to do...... The better shape he's in, prior to the surgery, the better.

I'll tree mail you my email. That would be great!!

Finally slept with little coughing! 10 hrs!!!!!!! Now I have a headache from sleeping too long and a sore neck from 2 pillows but I can take ibuprofen for that!! Now this AM I'm making up for the coughing part. At least I'm not trying to sleep!!

Glad you got a proper night's sleep, Ginny!
I sent you the email - hope it helps motivate your DH!!!!!!!!! It's SO important

Legalily said:I mentioned these ideas about knee exercises prior to surgery to DH and he said the doctor didn't mention it so he won't ask It's supposed to be a partial replacement and I have no idea what the recovery time is so I know how many days to take off. He said they'll probably tell him before the surgery but that doesn't help my work schedule at all

Ginny I have found men do NOT ask questions. I always go with my DH to the doctor and ask lots of questions. No one likes seeing me coming!

My DH not only won't ask questions, but when he's asked questions, sometimes he'll get it all wrong! He'll forget that he's been sick as a dog, and when asked how he's been feeling, he'll say he's fine! Well, at that instant in time, he may feel good, but that's doesn't really answer the doctor's question! When asked about taking his medication, he usually doesn't remember. He won't remember the fevers he's had the last month or so when next he sees the doctor. What make it worse is that the VA has a long-standing policy that they want the info directly from the veteran (if the veteran can possibly answer), so it's sometimes frowned upon if I answer the questions instead. So I'm put into the uncomfortable situation where I sometimes have to directly contradict what DH had just said if it's something important enough that I have to speak up.

Oh my Linda he sounds so much like my DH. It would not be good if I were not allowed to answer questions. That is a dumb policy at the VA. Men are just not into details and do not take medical stuff seriously in a lot of cases and they should be aware of that!

My dad had dementia and the VA knew it, but they would still ask him the questions when I was right there as his advocate. It was very frustrating.

Fortunately my husband is very good answering his doctors. I only go in rare cases where it's something critical that needs 2 heads to understand and ask questions.

So what I am hearing you all saying, correct me if I'm wrong, but we spend the first 18 years of our children's lives taking care of them and their doctors appts and talking to doctors, from the time we are able to when we are no longer able taking care of ourselves and talking to doctors, and from marriage and for the rest of their lives doing the same for our DHs Got it

yup!

You are very Right, Ginny - as men grow up, they revert back to being children needing to be cared for by Mommy

Legalily said:I mentioned these ideas about knee exercises prior to surgery to DH and he said the doctor didn't mention it so he won't ask It's supposed to be a partial replacement and I have no idea what the recovery time is so I know how many days to take off. He said they'll probably tell him before the surgery but that doesn't help my work schedule at all

Ginny there is a lot of information online. You don't have to wait to get information.

I live in a hick town in the mountains. When my knee was injured in an auto accident, I was researching like mad. I live alone and I wanted to do everything I could to avoid surgery. I was amazed at how much information from reliable sources was available.

How is it they say guys "can't live with 'em can't live without 'em ". There are other versions but I thought I'd show the guys on here a little compassion

So sorry about everyone's grumps.

I was grumpy today most of the day and finally figured out it was because I was really hungry!! Yup, feel much better after eating dinner.

Being hungry will do that. Glad that's all it was, Rita.

I don't have a glucose issue, or diabetes or any medical issue that I know of, but if I go for too long not eating (from 8am to 6pm for instance) and have a lot of running around doing errands or such, I will be really owly....... I've been known to snap at people and feel weak. I know I need to have something to eat, and then I inhale food. As soon as I eat, the weakness goes away, and I'm fine. I become human again Feel like that commercial I see - can't remember the chocolate bar it's advertising, but that's kind of what it's like.

Glad it was only hunger Rita.